Titus 2:11-13

"For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men, instructing us to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly in the present age, looking for the blessed hope and the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Christ Jesus."

Thursday, April 30, 2009

I Think She Moved!

Chiropractics is amazing!  A few months ago I learned about a chiropractic technique which is useful in allowing a baby (or babies) to get into the best possible position for birth.  In the case of twins, I am told that, ideally, both babies should be in a head-down position at the onset of labor to help ensure a successful vaginal delivery of both babies.  In my case, however, while Baby A has been vertex for quite some time now, Baby B has been transverse at the top of my uterus.  So, because I am desiring a vaginal birth of both babies, I decided to give this Webster Technique a try.  Today I returned to the chiropractor (who also happens to be a doula and a Sister in Christ) for my third adjustment and learned that Baby B seems to have shifted into a head-down position!  Instead of her body lying across the top of my uterus, it now seems (based on feel) that she is lying in a "L" position with her feet and legs across the top of my uterus and her head and body pointing downward along the right side of my uterus.  We hope to have this confirmed by the obstetrician at tomorrow's appointment and will then proceed with chiropractic adjustments as necessary.  In the meantime, I continue to ask God to get these babies into the best possible position for birth!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

04/24/09 OB Appointment, Ultrasound, and NST

Last Friday was a big day of appointments for me.  The day started with a 9:00 ultrasound followed by a consultation with the perinatologist, a 10:15 appointment with the OB, and a routine non-stress test.  Even though all these appointments were in the same building, I was fairly worn out by the time I got home at 2:00.

Our ultrasound revealed only good news!  Both babies looked great, with Baby A weighing 3 lbs. 10 oz. and Baby B weighing 4 lbs. 2 oz.  Their measurements put them both within a week of their estimated due date and within days of each other, indicating that they are both growing well.  They remain in their same "T" position (Baby A is vertex and Baby B is transverse at Baby A's feet), although Baby B has once again done a 180 degree turn.  They say Baby A's head is really low and even asked me if I'm feeling a lot of pressure (and I'm not).  We were also able to see that my cervix is still long and of a very normal length for 32 weeks.

The consultation with the perinatologist was also reassuring.  She was very pleased with the results of the ultrasound and even made the comment, "You're not going to have these babies early...."  Even though the ultrasound showed that the babies are thriving, she told us to start doing fetal kick counts every day.  Basically, each baby has to move ten times within two hours.  So far, both babies have been passing the test within 10-15 minutes.  I must say, though, it's a little tricky knowing which baby to attribute some of the movements to!

My obstetrician was also very pleased with the results of the ultrasound.  When he looked at the summary, he said, "Those are really good numbers.  Really good."  And when I told him I'm still not having any issues with contractions, he enthusiastically said, "You're going to do this, girl!  Three more weeks.  Gotta get three more weeks... at least."  My total weight gain is up to 35 lbs. (the total amount I gained with both Abel and Amariah), and although six of that happened in the past week and a half (yikes!), the doctor said I'm right on track.  My uterus was measuring 38 cm (at 32 weeks), making me officially bigger than I was when I delivered Amariah at 39 weeks 4 days.

The last appointment of the morning was the first of my routine non-stress tests.  In order to pass the test, both babies needed to have two heart rate accelerations of 15 bpm lasting 15 seconds each within a 20-minute time frame.  Both babies did great, and I was sent home after only 30 minutes of monitoring.

We continue to give God the glory for the health of our babies and for the endurance of my body in carrying them.  It has now been over four weeks since preterm labor symptoms first sent me to Labor & Delivery, and today Momma and babies are still going strong!  Praise God!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

To God Be the Glory

As I think about the events of the last three weeks, I am overwhelmed with gratitude both to God and to the Body of Christ.

Three weeks ago yesterday I was sent to Labor & Delivery for a non-stress test due to the fact that I was experiencing some of the warning signs of preterm labor (i.e. menstrual-like cramps and a low dull backache).  I was given a shot of terbutaline to stop the contractions and sent home only to return the following night with more contractions.  Two betamethasone shots and two days later, I returned home on Procardia and modified bedrest.

I spent the following week strictly following the doctor's orders (getting out of bed or up off the couch only to go to the bathroom, shower, and eat), faithfully taking the Procardia every six hours, having few to no contractions a day, and yet feeling increasingly worse with each additional pill and hour of laying around.  The unfavorable side effects of the Procardia (namely the lightheadedness, pounding heart, congestion, and headache) as well as of the bedrest (extreme fatigue, decreasing appetite, and increasing muscle weakness) caused me to question the necessity of such extreme measures, especially considering the fact that we knew the contractions I was having were not causing any cervical change and were therefore not true labor.

At the end of that week, I questioned the doctor about the possibility of increasing my activity and decreasing my Procardia dosage and was given permission to do both (even to go off the Procardia all together, which is what I promptly did!).  Over the past two weeks, then, I have gradually increased my activity back to a more normal level (pretty much doing everything but the more strenuous cleaning tasks) while still being very restful for certain portions of each day.  And in doing so, I have found not only that contractions--real or not--have not recurred but also that I actually feel better than I did three weeks ago (far less leg and back pain, largely due to my "taking it easier," I'm sure)!

So again I say that when I think about the events of the last three weeks I am overwhelmed with gratitude; and I want to give credit where credit is due.

The day after my husband and I returned home from our two-night stay in the hospital, we started learning of all the people who were (and are) praying for us and our babies.  My dear friend and Sister Melissa set up a prayer schedule and thereby facilitated the commitment of several other Sisters in Christ--some of whom we don't even know--to pray for us at a certain time every day until the babies are born and home from the hospital.  And many others in reading my blog and learning of our circumstances began praying as well, despite the fact that many of them, too, do not know us outside of the blogosphere.

We serve a God who is near and who hears and who cares; and I sincerely believe that He is hearing the prayers of not only Travis and me but also of our Christian family and friends and of Believers throughout the blogosphere.  Not only am I still pregnant with two growing, healthy babies, I am feeling better than any 31 1/2-weeks pregnant-with-twins mother should!  I am truly humbled and blessed in knowing that so many of you are praying for us; and I am eternally grateful to the God who is on the receiving end of your prayers.

Thank you, my dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ; and praise You, my awesome God!

Friday, April 17, 2009

100 Things About Me

My blogging friend Lynnette recently did a post which revealed 100 things about herself, and I thought it looked like fun.  One hundred things sounds like a lot, but let's see what (hopefully interesting) things I can come up with!...

  1. I was born in Norton, Kansas, on March 23, 1983.
  2. When my mom was 10 weeks pregnant with me, she had severe bleeding and was told by the doctors she was miscarrying.  She and my dad cried out to the Lord, and here I am today!
  3. I grew up just outside of Hendley, Nebraska, a small town with a grain elevator, a post office, and 40 people!
  4. As a small child, I seemed to have a sense when something bad was going to happen.  Just before the liftoff of the Space Shuttle Challenger in 1986, I told my mom something was wrong and asked her to turn on the TV.  Moments later she watched as the space shuttle disintegrated.
  5. The girls in my grade school class used to fight over who was going to play with me at recess.
  6. I asked Jesus to come into my heart somewhere around the age of eight while attending Camp JOY in Alma, Nebraska.
  7. I once held the title of Wilsonville Rodeo Queen.
  8. The only time I ever got sent to the hall in grade school was when I cried because a classmate wrongly accused me of killing the class hamster.  I still don't know why I got in trouble for that....
  9. When I was going into 7th grade, my school consolidated with two other schools, increasing the number of students in my (graduating) class to 35.
  10. The maddest I ever made my parents was when my junior high friends and I changed the greeting on our answering machine.
  11. The worst trick I ever played on my parents was when I came home from the mall with a fake nose ring.  My mom's first words were, "Get that thing out of your nose before your dad sees it!"  And when my dad saw it, he was so angry I could hardly convince him it was fake.  Needless to say, I never came home with any real body piercings!
  12. My favorite subject in high school was Math, followed closely by English.
  13. In high school I was involved in volleyball, basketball, softball, cheerleading, band, choir, Mock Trial, drama, and Speech.
  14. My Mock Trial team placed 3rd in the state competition one year.
  15. I made the state competition in Speech (serious prose) one year and performed well.  The following year didn't go so well--I remember one meet when I totally blanked out and stood silent in front of a room full of people as I desperately searched my memory for my next line.  I never did come up with it.  How embarrassing!
  16. My first car was a red 1991 Ford Escort.  My sister and I put almost 50 miles on it a day just driving back and forth to school.
  17. My first job was waitressing at Pizza Hut in Norton, Kansas.
  18. I went on a three-week mission trip to India the summer before my senior year of high school, and it was there I was finally baptized.
  19. I was valedictorian of my graduating high school class.
  20. I attended Northwestern College in Orange City, Iowa, where I studied Accounting.
  21. I was a Northwestern College football and basketball cheerleader and eventually became a co-student coach for the squad.
  22. I finished my freshman year of college with a 4.0 GPA, and so did my roommate.  I guess we were a good pair!
  23. I met my husband at college in August 2002.  We started dating in December 2002, got engaged 15 months later in March 2004, and married another 15 months later in June 2005.
  24. I was diagnosed with a focal point dystonia commonly called Writer's Cramp after gradually losing my ability to write right-handed.  I have since taught myself to write left-handed.
  25. My dream was to attend Law school after obtaining my B.A. in Accounting.  And my other dream was to get married and have children.  The latter trumped the former, and I quit college with a 3.91 GPA and only three semesters left to go.
  26. After quitting college, I moved in with my future mother- and father-in-law whom I barely knew (and whose son had not yet proposed to me!) and lived there for a year.  Lots of people thought I was crazy, but I knew in my heart that Travis and I would be married.  (Disclaimer:  Travis and I did not live together--he was still away at college.)
  27. Many people think I look more like Travis' twin sister than I do my own sister.
  28. Right out of college, the Lord provided me with a great job at Farmers State Bank in Marion, Iowa, where I worked as a teller for eight months before being hired as a Personal Banker and eventually becoming a trainer for the department.  I LOVED my job.
  29. I sang on my church's worship team for a time.
  30. I walked down the aisle to Selah's "You Raise Me Up."
  31. I whispered my wedding vows to my husband because I couldn't speak through my tears of joy.
  32. I kissed my husband for the first time at the altar.
  33. Travis and my first home was a 600 square foot duplex in Center Point, Iowa.
  34. I got pregnant about 7-10 days after our wedding--before we had even taken our honeymoon!
  35. Upon suspecting I was pregnant, I went to a city park during my lunch break from work and took a test in the primitive bathroom there.  What an ugly place to receive such beautiful news!
  36. I carried my first baby to 40 weeks 6 days.
  37. After a short six-hour medication-free labor, one round of pushing, and another hour of labor, my first baby was born by cesarean section due to his "failure to descend."
  38. When Abel was three weeks old, I came down with mastitis and a uterine infection at the same time.  The hardest thing about it was that despite how awful I felt, I still had a baby to care for.  Welcome to motherhood! :-)
  39. I officially became a stay-at-home mom at the end of my 12-week maternity leave when I left a job I loved for a job I love even more!
  40. I found out I was pregnant with our second child when Abel was 7 1/2 months old.
  41. Despite the short amount of time in between deliveries, I had a successful VBAC with Amariah.  It was a far more beautiful experience than cesarean was.
  42. Before even leaving the hospital after Amariah's birth, I told my husband I was ready to do it again!  I think he thought I was crazy. :-)
  43. I love breastfeeding!
  44. Travis and I lost our third child to miscarriage on July 14, 2008.
  45. Three months after my miscarriage, I found out I was pregnant again.  When we told Abel, his response was, "Two babies?"  A month later, we found out he was right!
  46. Our twin girls are due June 19, 2009!
  47. Growing up I always thought it would be terrible to have twins.  But about the time I met my husband, God changed my heart.  Praise God for preparing me for what He knew was to come so that I might accept it as a blessing!
  48. I am deeply desiring another VBAC despite the odds and trusting that God's purpose will prevail!
  49. These babies will be our third and fourth children (plus one in Heaven!), and in no way do I desire for them to be the last.  I truly believe God at His Word when He says that children are a blessing from the Lord!  (See Psalm 127:3-5.)
  50. I enjoy being with my children.
  51. I am a perfectionist and therefore prefer to do things myself.
  52. I am really bad about getting lost in my thoughts and not hearing what's going on around me.
  53. I LOVE to write... and to blog!
  54. I am a very practical spender--every dollar I spend is definitely premeditated.
  55. I always wipe the water spots off my faucets.
  56. I love being outside on warm sunny days.
  57. I never drink milk... but I've been craving chocolate milk throughout my current pregnancy.
  58. I used to drink a lot of Mountain Dew, but I broke the caffeine habit before getting married in preparation for being pregnant.
  59. I have a reputation for spending a long time brushing my teeth.
  60. I used to say I would never go anywhere without wearing at least eye makeup.  Now I am rarely seen wearing any makeup at all.
  61. I have a (large) bowl of chocolate ice cream almost every day.
  62. When I'm pregnant I get the overwhelming urge to chew ice.
  63. I think USANA's vitamins are the best on the market.
  64. Ever since I got married, I shave my legs (almost) every day.
  65. Francine Rivers' Mark of the Lion Series are the best fiction books I have ever read.
  66. Now that I'm a mom, a quick trip to the salon for a haircut feels like a day of pampering at the spa. :-)
  67. Needles freak me out (which adds to my motivation for a medication-free childbirth!).
  68. I love taking long, hot showers and try not to take them for granted.  What a blessing to have warm, clean, running water!
  69. When I talk to my mom on the phone, our conversations usually last about an hour.  (And I think I usually do most of the talking....) :-)
  70. The kids' nap time is an essential part of my day.
  71. I thoroughly rinse my dishes before putting them in the dishwasher.
  72. I despise mushrooms.  Ironically, we painted our living room a color called Portabello.
  73. It would be hard for me to live without Internet access and a cell phone.
  74. I don't understand the text messaging craze.  I think I'll stick to e-mail for now! :-)
  75. The book of 1 John has played a huge role in my growth as a Christian and even in my relationships with others.  I guess it can be difficult for a perfectionist to admit she's wrong, but the Lord is patiently teaching me!
  76. I have never broken a bone or had surgery (other than my c-section).
  77. I love not having a TV in my living room.
  78. I used the money from my high school graduation for a down payment on a 1998 Ford Escort ZX2.  It is now the car my husband drives to work.
  79. New shoes are one of my favorite things to buy but one of my least favorite things to shop for.
  80. I often find myself singing really silly songs to my children and would probably be quite embarrassed if anyone ever caught me!
  81. I am good at being neat and following a system of organization but not so good at creating a system of organization.
  82. I am addicted to having something on my lips, usually Vaseline.
  83. The first thing I do in the mornings is open up the window blinds and let the sun shine in!
  84. Scrapbooking is not my thing.
  85. I enjoy doing laundry and ironing.
  86. I think my husband is the best smell in the world. :-)
  87. I am utterly amazed by God's design for pregnancy and childbirth.
  88. I had never eaten a fresh pear until about three months ago.  I can't believe I was missing out on something so delicious all this time!
  89. When I sleep I like to pull the covers all the way up to my chin.
  90. Something about being pregnant causes me to snore.  Even though I can't help it, it embarrasses me and makes me feel a bit unladylike. :-)
  91. My favorite food is corn on the cob with butter and salt.  Lucky for me, my father-in-law grows it!
  92. I never paint my fingernails.
  93. I am planning to homeschool our children--at least in the early years.  The only thing I dread about it is anything involving arts and crafts.  (I don't like messes, and I am quite lacking in creativity.)  Perhaps I will have to enroll them in an art class somewhere....
  94. I like to dress up whenever I get the chance since most of my days are spent in "mom clothes."
  95. Texas Roadhouse and Olive Garden are two of my favorite restaurants.
  96. Every time my husband and I are going to be separated overnight--which rarely happens, thankfully--I cry when we say goodbye.
  97. At this stage in our lives, Travis and I don't get out for many dates.  I'm okay with that for now, but I hope that someday we can go to the theater and maybe even see a show on Broadway!
  98. I don't really know anything about hockey, but I think it's the most exciting sporting game I've ever attended.
  99. I feel honored that God has called me to be a wife and mother.
  100. I will never tell anyone how long it just took me to come up with 100 things about myself!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

04/14/09 OB Appointment

Today I am 30 weeks 4 days pregnant and feeling great!  I had another routine OB appointment this afternoon, and everything looked good!  My total weight gain for this pregnancy is up to 30 pounds, my blood pressure remains normal, and my uterus is measuring 36 cm.  Baby A's heart was beating at 154 bpm and Baby B's at 144 bpm.

The doctor commented that our goal should be to make it five more weeks, at which point our babies would probably be able to go home from the hospital with us.  I told him I'm hoping (and praying!!!) to make it at least that long!

My next appointment and ultrasound is scheduled for Friday, April 24th, right at the 32-week mark.  That day we will also be sent to Labor & Delivery for a non-stress test, the first of what will be a weekly routine from here on out.  I pray that my babies will pass these tests with flying colors and that there will be no cause for alarm (or false alarm, for that matter)!

To the many of you who are praying for us, THANK YOU!  Thank you for caring, and thank you for being the Body of Christ to us.  May God bless you richly just as He is us for whom you are praying!

Saturday, April 11, 2009


I was going to post today about all the little adjustments we are making in the Squires household as I slowly modify my "modified bedrest," increasing my activity little by little (and having no physical issues with doing so!) while still maintaining some mandatory resting periods throughout my day--adjustments such as letting my house get a little less tidy than I am comfortable with, devising ways to make fewer trips up and down the stairs, and asking my husband to do things like grocery shop and clean the floors; but there is one adjustment far more worthy of telling about, for it involves the two little people who have been more affected by all this than anyone else.

Abel, my three-year old son, and Amariah, my 21-month old daughter, are accustomed to relying on Mommy for all their needs.  I am with them 24/7, and whenever a need arises, I have always been there to fulfill it.  However, in my attempts to "take it easy" for the remainder of this pregnancy--and in preparation for suddenly having twice as many children (and therefore, twice as many needs) to care for--I have stepped up my expectations of Abel and Amariah.

For example, instead of lifting Amariah into her booster seat at meal time, I have taught her to utilize a step stool to get herself into her chair.  And instead of allowing Abel to have numerous toys out in the living room at once (which creates a bigger mess that I end up feeling compelled to clean up myself because it's quicker that way), I have been asking him to put away anything he's done with before moving on to the next thing.

And today at naptime, I decided to try another high expectation:  I asked them to take themselves upstairs to bed, giving only the instruction that Abel was to help Amariah get tucked in.  After giving Travis and me hugs and kisses, my two little children who are far bigger than I sometimes realize took off up the stairs hand-in-hand.  A few seconds later I quietly followed and proceeded to secretly observe what simultaneously brought joy to my heart and tears to my eyes.

As Abel and Amariah entered their bedroom, Abel said to Amariah, "Help me pick up these toys, Sissy.  This room is a mess."  I watched and listened as they worked together to put every toy in its proper place.  When everything was placed according to Abel's high standards (which I'm proud to say he has acquired from his Mommy!), Abel then announced, "Sissy, we need to pray.  Come hold my hand."  And I watched and listened as they sat side-by-side and hand-in-hand with heads bowed as Abel prayed, "Jesus, please help Sissy do better and grow strong, Jesus.  Amen."  Then, after changing himself into his pajamas, Abel told Amariah to lay down.  She crawled into bed, and Abel proceeded to place each of her three blankets perfectly on top of her.  "Goodnight, Sissy!" was followed by a big, sweet kiss and the announcement, "I'm going night-night, too, Sissy!"; and he crawled into bed.

I came back down the stairs in awe of both the evident reasonableness of my lofty command and the obedience and accountability of my two babies who aren't babies anymore.  Not only did they obey me in taking themselves to bed, but of their own accord they also tidied their bedroom and prayed before doing so.

Needless to say, I am blessed beyond measure by my two dear children and by the fruit of our labors in training and disciplining them; and I am thankful to God that He is using this time of adjustments to prepare all of us for the adjustments sure to come!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

04/07/09 OB Appointment

Yesterday was my first OB appointment since being placed on bedrest and Procardia last week.  It has been several hours since we visited with the doctor, but I think I'm still processing everything we talked about.

My weight gain and blood pressure were good as were the babies' heart rates.  My uterus is measuring 34 cm at 29 1/2 weeks--only 1 cm of growth in the past 2 1/2 weeks.  This is of no concern, however, as we know from Thursday's ultrasound that the babies are growing wonderfully (Baby A was weighing 2 lbs. 4 oz. and Baby B was weighing 2 lbs. 8 oz.)!

All that routine stuff aside, Travis and I were able to visit with the doctor concerning the modified bedrest and Procardia which were prescribed during our recent stay at the hospital.  We wanted to get an idea of whether these things would be continued indefinitely or whether my "condition" could be re-evaluated and a little bit of normalcy possibly reintroduced to my life.

As for the modified bedrest, the doctor said it's pretty standard that they would say to continue that until 34 weeks of pregnancy.  He went on to say, though, that I shouldn't feel bad about doing the activities necessary to care for myself and my family and, furthermore, that there is no medical evidence that bedrest delays the onset of labor.

In regards to the Procardia, the doctor said that many doctors won't even prescribe it due to the fact that it is only effective in slowing or stopping contractions that aren't doing anything anyway.  Procardia does nothing, he said, to slow or stop or even to delay the onset of real labor (where contractions are accompanied by dilation of the cervix).  In effect, Procardia is given more for the mother's convenience and peace of mind, as in slowing or stopping "practice" contractions it eliminates some of the worry and uncertainty of whether or not the contractions are indeed real labor.  That being said, he gave me the choice to space out my doses of Procardia or even to stop taking it altogether.

Additionally, we learned that the fetal fibronectin test (fFN) which I had done last Monday--and which came back negative--serves as a good indicator that I will not go into labor within two weeks of the negative result.  So, essentially, if I am looking for a medical source of "peace of mind," I could have this test repeated every two weeks and not have to live with the unfavorable side effects of the Procardia which is apparently prescribed for just that purpose (i.e. "peace of mind").

Needless to say, I left my appointment feeling some weird mix of relief and confusion.  Why wasn't I better informed about exactly what the Procardia would or wouldn't do before paying for the prescription and taking it every six hours for a week?  And if Procardia and bedrest are ineffective in delaying the onset of labor, why were they prescribed in the first place?

I feel without a doubt that I do not need to be medicated in order to have "peace of mind" concerning this pregnancy and that I do not want to unnecessarily medicate myself and my unborn babies.  I have therefore chosen to stop taking the Procardia.  My last dose was almost 24 hours ago, and I already feel better--this morning I was relieved to wake up headache- and congestion-free and without the feeling of lightheadedness and a pounding heart.

As the medication continues to clear from my system, I would like to try adding a little activity back into my routine while still imposing on myself some mandatory periods of rest throughout my day.  I don't know yet what this activity should look like, so I will continue to prayerfully consider what will be best for me and my unborn babies.

To those of you who are praying for us and those of you who have made yourselves available to help me in this time, I am eternally grateful for your support.  I know that God is hearing our prayers, and I am comforted with the peace that only God can give.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Consider It Joy

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials." (James 1:2)

Bedrest.  Not one of the "trials" I ever thought I would encounter.  I'm healthy.  I've had two previous wonderful pregnancies.  I can usually accomplish anything I set my mind to.  My body can handle this.... Even being pregnant with twins, I didn't even consider that I could be a candidate for bedrest.

And now that I'm on bedrest and recognizing my somewhat fragile state (and wondering if it seems to others I am too "weak" to handle a twin pregnancy), I feel a little bit like my pride has been checked.  And I consider it joy.

Bedrest.  Not one of the "trials" I ever thought I could handle.  I'm independent.  I'm a perfectionist.  My children, my house, and my life are under control.  I could never let someone else do my work.... I never considered that God might ask me to.

And now that He has, I realize that I can... and that it's hard.  And I consider it joy.

You see, I have learned that it is often in times of trial (living with dystonia, losing a baby, going on bedrest...) and in times of coming to an end of myself that I am matured, sanctified, perfected.  I find myself entering into this trial with joy knowing that I will come out of it changed.  I look forward to what God will teach me in the coming weeks and months; and though it may be painful... and emotional... and hard... at times, yet I will consider it joy!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Getting to Know ME!

If you're visiting from Lynnette's Getting to Know You (or anywhere else!), welcome!  In order to help you get to know me, allow me to introduce myself!  I am a born-again Christian, wife to a wonderful husband, and mother of five children--two here on earth, one in heaven, and two on the way.  I love to write, and my blog is a place where I can record my thoughts and share them with whoever cares to read.  I especially love to share about what God is teaching me through my everyday circumstances.  To catch up on some of the latest things I've learned, you might want to check out my next post as well as those labeled The Story of Ande Lynn (the baby we lost to miscarriage last July) or Desiring a VBAC.  Some of my other favorite posts are listed in the sidebar under "The Best of the Archives."

Thank you for visiting!  I hope you will be encouraged as you peruse my blog.  Feel free to leave a comment on any post so I know you were here!

In Christ,

Thursday, April 2, 2009


My head is swimming with thoughts about my great God as I reflect on the events of the past five days.  I would have never expected that Sunday, at 28 2/7 weeks gestation, I would be facing the beginning signs of preterm labor which would lead to two trips to Labor & Delivery, three shots, and two nights in the hospital.  My plans of how I would productively spend my week alone without Abel and Amariah most certainly did not include entering into preterm labor, living in a hospital bed for two days, and being sent home on bedrest and contraction-stopping medication.  But just as the Bible says, "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails" (Proverbs 19:21).

I guess I'm not here claiming that God "purposed" for me to have issues with preterm labor, but I do believe that He is at least using these circumstances to bring about His purpose.

I've been thinking about the requests which I have been making known to God, a couple of which include

  • I praise You for Your wondrous design for pregnancy and for the ability of the female body to be with child(ren!).  I ask, God, that You would enable me to carry these babies to full term and that they would be born of sufficient weight and in perfect health.
  • I thank You, God, that You have blessed Travis and me with a beautiful family.  Lord, for the sake of all my children, please allow that these babies be dismissed from the hospital within a couple days of delivery.  May there be no need for a stay of any length in the NICU which would undoubtedly tear me either from my home and my family or from my new babies.
And, further, I've been thinking about the fact that only God knows exactly how these prayers will be answered.  As I think about the sovereignty of God and about His ability to work in and through the most unlikely of circumstances, I realize that perhaps God knows that my body will require bedrest if I am to carry these babies to full term; that perhaps God knows that my babies need me to rest in order for them to receive enough of my body's resources to be born of sufficient weight and in perfect health; and that perhaps God knows that my babies need the steroid shots I have been given in order to avoid a stay in the NICU upon their birth.

Indeed, my faith is not shaken by the change of plans or by what can at first glance seem like unanswered prayers; but it is instead strengthened in knowing that God is hearing my prayers and that He is working things out according to His plan--not mine.  I am blessed to be the recipient of His true and trustworthy promises, namely those of Psalm 55:22 ("Cast your burden upon the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken.") and Philippians 4:6-7 ("Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.")

It is in Him alone I continue to trust; it is to Him alone I continue to pray; it is by Him alone I continue to be sustained; and it is because of Him alone I continue to be unshaken.

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